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A Long-Awaited Anouncement, And A Thank You To MB *PICS*

 
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LunaP
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Joined: 03 Oct 2011
Posts: 1154
Location: Richmond, VA
Pink Buddy 125

PostPosted: Fri Sep 21, 2012 12:23 am    Post subject: A Long-Awaited Anouncement, And A Thank You To MB *PICS* Reply with quote

Friends, Dorks, Scooterists, Comrades:

UPDATE:
Here's photos, in case anybody is curious. There are recent (i.e., healed, not gory) photos of my leg, and xrays... when I get my hands on them, I will add photos of the Buddy. Here's the set on Flickr.

This post is to inform you that I have news regarding my situation. Today I met with my lawyer, and received my settlement; the legal part of my journey is over and I can safely be public about everything that has happened to me since January.

First and foremost, I want to expressly thank everybody who helped me, both with monetary donations and words of encouragement. You will never know how much you helped. Those of you who donated, in the next several weeks I will be going through my Paypal records and attempting to send you money back (I have no idea if Paypal has limits to how much I can send per month, etc., since I don't have a business account); your help was incredibly generous, and I know many of you sent me funds when you yourself were also in need. You must know that my family and I would have had a lot of trouble without your collective donations; for these I give you thanks not just from me, but also on my family's behalf. Regardless of whether or not you were able to send help in the form of a wire, I will forever be grateful for your hopes, prayers, thoughts, and kind words. There were many days they kept me going and positive.

There is SO much that I could never post before that I can now that many of you may want to know. Many of you probably have questions; I haven't been around for a few months on purpose, since being tight-lipped was decidedly the safest thing for the settlement. So, I'm going to try and address everything, methodically... be forewarned, this post will be long. In lieu of a TL:DR, I'll try to section it so that you can skip parts of the story if you like.

Pictures will follow.

How did the accident happen?
In the initial chaos, many people did not understand my report of the accident and how exactly it happened (by many people, I mean everybody except the first responding officer and those involved). I suppose I could blame it on the morphine Wink the truth is that it seems without knowing the intersection, unless I explain very carefully, people seem to have a hard time understanding how it happened... so I'm going to try and explain as well as I can.
It was a Friday afternoon, I left Lokky's apartment alone on the Buddy. It was shortly before 12 noon, bright and sunny out, the road was dry as a bone, and it was 65. I was wearing my helmet, my Kilimanjaro with the quilt liner removed, khakis and flat shoes with low cut socks (it'd been so cold, it was a nice change of pace from boots, sweatpants and 2 layers of thick socks).
I was about 2 blocks down the road from the corner the apartment building was on; just ahead of me, the road would lose its large center median and shrink, pass a side street or two on either side, then come to a light at an intersection.
Just as I pass the median's end, I can see a small SUV pull out from a side street up ahead and to my left; the driver pulls across the two oncoming lanes and stops on the double yellow, because I am in the left lane and there is a car behind and to my right in the lane beside me, we are both headed towards him and he must wait for us to pass.
Then he begins to pull out; he didn't stop, he did a rolling stop. I know I can't swerve left, there are cars approaching from the light, and I can't swerve right because I'll be hit by the car behind me in the right lane. I was unnaturally calm as I looked right at his wheel well and thought, 'Oh shit. I'm going to crash. Right there.'
I didn't have any time to even think 'They didn't see me' or 'They didn't look', those thoughts didn't come until a long time after. Long. But that's exactly what happened. Either he thought he had enough room to cross the street, or he didn't see me and tried to pull into my lane. Either way, he was barely into my lane when I collided with his right front wheel well.
So, for clarification- initial reports by Lokky were that he blew a stop sign and hit me; this is not quite so... but it's not any less his fault, and in some ways even worse. He was in the middle of the street and could see everything, and he wasn't exactly going too fast to stop or anything.

What happened to you/what happened next?
The accident happened approximately 2 blocks west of the corner where Lokky lives. I/we are lucky enough that there happens to be an ambulance center 2 blocks north, and a fire station 2 blocks south of his apartments- both of them less than 5 minutes travel time from my crash site.
That didn't keep the time from passing as if it were years before they got there.
I have odd pieces of my memory from the actual crash; I don't believe that I passed out, but I do think that everything was too traumatic and happened too fast for my brain to process it.
I don't remember feeling or seeing the impact, I remember the sound. Then, I remember the feeling of moving through the air. Once things slowed down and I became aware of my surroundings and senses again, I was on my right side, with my face just an inch or two from a curb corner. My left hand was on the sidewalk in front of my face. I was a little confused. I realized there was somebody calling 911, I could hear them. Then I realized my hand hurt really bad (ironically, other than beating it really hard against the rusty storm drain set in the curb and having orange stains for weeks, my left hand was fine). But staring at it, I realized there was some blood and... let's call it organic debris. Then I realized I couldn't move much. And I got real worried.
The policeman arrived about the time I was examining the state of my hand, I just hadn't paid him much attention because deciding that my hand hurt took a lot of concentration. Then I tried to move and look at my leg, and I realized I was laying on my right arm oddly. I didn't have a lot of time to ponder that, because that's about when I started hurting. Folks, I have to say that I've been in pain before. I've been in a lot of pain before. I've broken a bone before. I've yelled "Ow!" (or various curse words) before. I've been in so much pain it's made me cry before. But before this, I had never experienced the kind of pain that is so terrible all you can do is scream at the top of your lungs. And that's exactly what I did, I laid in the street screaming.
It felt like I did that for half an hour, but I know it wasn't anywhere near that. The rescue squad and ambulance arrived shortly. You know something is really wrong when they scoop you and run- all they did was take a vital or two, take a visual of my leg, put me in a neckbrace, stick me on the backboard and go.
At this point, I was nauseous and upset. I was also compulsively thanking all the emergency response personnel. In the ambulance, they started an IV, gave me morphine and zofran (for the nausea). According to the police report, my crash happened at 11:50am. My mother says she got the call from the ER's social worker at 12:15. To survive a crash, have emergency response, be assessed and be transported in under 25 minutes is amazing. Part of it is luck- how close I was to the emergency response centers and the hospital itself- and part of it was the care I received. Without this luck, I would be an amputee.
My memory becomes spotty once I reach the ER- suffice it to say that large doses of morphine and fentanyl did their jobs. The first responder, Officer Rose, accompanied me in the ER; he was very nice. He and a social worker were both very impressed that I rattled off at least 4 emergency contacts and their phone numbers to them each; the doctors were impressed that I was lucid enough to recite to them each medication I was on, including dosages. I'm good like that. I remember my mother and sisters showing up; although I have no idea how long it took for them to get there.
When I came into the ER from the ambulance, I had no pulse in my foot. I believe it took them almost two hours to get a pulse there, and when they did it was weak. Around 4pm, I was sent into surgery after signing a consent for amputation; I had been told they would likely amputate below the knee.
I woke up at almost 11pm- the surgery took nearly six hours. I was completely confused and doped up. But when I looked down, I still had two legs.

The Hospital
I was in the hospital until the end of February. I would go on to have seven more surgeries in the span of a month. One of them, I woke up earlier than I should have- I dare say that ordeal was just as traumatic as what got me there. I moved floors, hated nurses, missed home, was depressed, couldn't eat, couldn't crap, developed anxiety issues that warranted medicating, and tried not to cry every minute I was alone and awake.
I slept a lot, though. A lot.
No, really. A LOT.
My right clavicle had a long, diagonal fracture, and my right shoulder joint had been separated in the crash. If you've never had one, clavicle (collarbone) breaks hurt like a BITCH. If I hadn't been so heavily medicated, I would have never slept.
My left leg was broken clean through. My tibia (the thicker bone that goes from your knee to ankle) was broken badly nearly halfway down; the surgeons inserts a metal rod secured with two screws at each end. My fibula (the thin bone in the same part of your leg) has a 3-4 inch gap in it; they said that I came into the ER like that.
That gap in my bone is too big and the bone too thin to bridge with metal or a graft, and is the direct result of the trauma to my leg. In addition to broken bones, my leg was damn near destroyed. The whole front of my leg was torn to shreds, down to deep tissue with bone showing; the back of my calf had a huge chunk taken out of it exactly where I am missing part of my fibula.
Surgeries in the hospital were to do things like remove skin from my left upper thigh and apply grafts to my wounds. I was very lucky and able to avoid having to have a skin flap removed- which is where they graft not just skin, but some of the deeper tissue below as well. This was due to miraculous machines they attached to my leg surgically called wound vacs- machines that constantly removed fluid draining from my leg wounds early on. Apparently the fact that I had three of them on one extremity is a testament to how serious a condition my leg was in. At one point I also had to have a nerve block (aka, an epidural) in my thigh to help manage the pain because IV pain meds weren't enough.
When they began talking about moving me out, I panicked quite a bit. I certainly didn't at all feel like I should be leaving the hospital- at that point I couldn't move or be touched without feeling the need to scream, and I hadn't yet mastered sitting in a chair like a normal person without my blood pressure rising (it happens when you are bedridden for a long time), or using the bathroom like a normal person. (Side note- seriously... take a moment and be thankful that you can sit on a toilet and take a shit. No, really.) Shocked
I spent the next two weeks in an inpatient rehab facility. I was the only patient under the age of 60. It sucked. I had to readjust to meds- I was no longer on IVs, spent several days nauseous and unable to eat, therapy caused me a a tremendous amount of pain.
By the end of the stay, somehow I felt like maybe I could be normal again. I had learned how to shower, regained the ability to use the toilet, my shoulder had become just barely strong enough to wheel myself around for a few minutes, my leg could stand a few minutes of being held down vertically towards the floor, and I had been taught to use a walker. My walker was modified with a platform for my injured arm, and a makeshift rubber-band cradle to prop my foot in and keep my leg from bouncing around; in other words, I had to use a walker while hopping on one foot. Take a second a visualize that, if you will. Yes, you can laugh, it's funny. Clown
Mom took me home in the middle of March; the first few weeks home were spent sleeping and feeling very, very, very, very sick. They sent me home on arguably the strongest pain meds available. After about a week or two, I decided to kick them cold turkey and asked for something less strong; which put me through a week or so of what I must assume were withdrawal symptoms. It was late April/early May before I exhibited any real interest in eating food, other than the occasional bowl of buttered rice or handful of grapes. When I crashed, I weighed about 235lbs; at my lowest after the hospital stay, before I started to eat, I was 185lbs. My hair also came out in alarming amounts whenever I brushed it or took a shower... it seems that all the meds and anesthesia made me shed and grow a new coat. Laughing
I had a therapist and a nurse come to my home twice a week until the end of May. My mother had to change the dressings on my grafts daily. For the first few weeks, I also had to have daily injections of blood thinners that would prevent me from having a dangerous clot, since I was a post-surgical invalid.
In late May, my Orthopaedic Surgeon removed the two lower screws from the rod in my leg; this was to foster a little give and take at the break site, with the theory apparently being that encouraging the movement would encourage healing. This was discouraging to me, because the surgery put me in quite a lot of pain; both at the site where he cut in to remove the screws, and at the point where the break was. I had just begun to feel sound and safe putting full weight on my leg and using a cane around the house, and the surgery set me back to using a walker for a week or so at least- I have been in pain at the spot where the break in the bone is ever since. I got stubborn and forced myself onto the cane again; you see, in May I was able to go and stay with Lokky for the first time in months Smile
After the screw removal I had a great deal of extra swelling in and around my ankle that has taken months to subside. In July, I was told I must stop using the soft, knee-high surgical boot they provided me with in inpatient rehab, and my Ortho instructed me to have a custom orthotic brace made. Also in July I began outpatient physical therapy. In August I learned that my tibia was not healing, and my Ortho warned me that if it didn't begin healing in the next few months that I may have to have a bone graft done. At my most recent visit last Friday, the xray finally showed small but distinct signs of the break finally being bridged, so we are waiting six more weeks and taking another look. If I have to have surgery, it won't be a traditional graft... they will go in and replace the rod in my tibia, and when they do, marrow will move into the break, and it will be like doing a graft, without having to take bone from somewhere else in my body.

So how is your quality of life/what is your prognosis?
Good question. I'm in therapy still, and will be for a LONG time- really, as long as my insurance will allow me to be. Insurance notwithstanding, I expect to still be in therapy next summer, at least. Currently, I have greatly reduced sensation on the whole topside of my left foot and some of its toes; no sensation whatsoever (not even pressure below the surface) above the left side of my ankle and just above it, the left and some of the back side of my lower leg, up until the gash in my leg (where my fibula is missing). Mr. Deeds jokes have been made. The real problem, however, is that in those same areas, I also don't have any muscle control.
Without muscles there to help me counter balance, and with my fibula permanently broken, I am forever at risk for rolling, spraining, or breaking my ankle very, very easily. I can also slip more easily than other people, and don't have a normal gait because I can't control my ankle and foot properly. I am supposed to wear my orthotic brace and good, supportive shoes basically at all times... but I can't stand them.
Part of it is me being stubborn. Part of it is that the brace is really really uncomfortable- my surgeon will NEVER convince me that I can get used to that thing (seriously, its a plastic sheet wrapped around the back of my leg that extends down under my foot... I have to walk on it too). Part of it is that I'm kind of self conscious about it- you can see the bulge of it through pants, and wearing it make me feel even more like a cripple- it's just a constant physical reminder. I feel more capable and normal when I am not wearing it. Part of it is that I sincerely believe that it doesn't do me good to put my foot in the brace and forego the opportunity to force myself to try and use muscles and flex in ways that I should have control over and do not. I have been wearing flip flops, and I realize how crazy that sounds, but I promise I wouldn't have done it if I didn't feel safe, and I honestly believe that my teeny improvements I've shown in therapy recently have been a direct result of my insisting on wearing them and forcing my foot to try and use those muscles on its own.
However, the brace does let me wear shoes I wouldn't otherwise be able to. You see, due to my loss of sensation, swelling, and curvature of the foot due to loss of muscle control, I have a lot of trouble getting on shoes. Any shoes. My left foot is permanently swollen about half a size bigger than the other, tilted inwards, curved down, and I can't control my big toe so it gets jammed up when I try and put my foot in a shoe (other reasons I made the executive decision to put on flip flops again). Without the brace, I can only wear sandals, stretchy slippers, clogs, flats that have very open tops and flexible soles or sneakers that lace waaay down the foot and have flexible soles, like converses. The brace sort of acts like a shoehorn, so with it on, I can shove it into some better sneaker-type shoes.
My improvements in therapy mostly amount to becoming more and more stable walking, and gaining a teensy bit of finesse in my toe movements. My right shoulder joint is very weak and is often painful, or pops; my Therapist says that is in part because of having to use the cane. She says my rotator cuff is injured and need strengthening; she also says my hips and knees need strength training, because I've been so sedentary.
Currently, I can walk very short distances (i.e., around the house for a short time) without my cane or brace. Outside the house, I take the cane everywhere. On good days I can walk a lot with the cane; on bad days, I don't get out of bed. I'm still on strong pain meds, although I take them as needed, not constantly... I realize I will be dealing with this pain for the rest of my life, and most days I try to suck it up and take OTC's. It will get better once the bone has healed, but breaks this bad take a long time to heal, and I hear that the pain can linger for a while after that. Both my knee and ankle hurt sporadically and can't take a whole lot of pressure.
I can't run or jog, ever again. I can't kneel. I can't squat. I can't get on my tip toes. I can't sit on the ground because it's hard to get up. I'm not allowed to carry heavy things. I have to be very careful going up and down stairs. I have to be very careful in the shower. I can't carry much. When I go to the store, I use an electric cart. When we go somewhere with a lot of walking involved, we use the wheelchair I am still renting.
Personally, I don't expect too much of a change. I'm not being pessimistic... I just feel it. There was a lot of damage done. I don't expect lifetime movie miracles.

So what does this mean for your near future?
Well, lots of things. Technically, I may be able to go back to my job and work... but there is no telling when. Once I go back, my work will have to make 'reasonable accommodations' for me, as per the law; even so, it is a possibility that they may be dissatisfied by the sheer number of things I cannot do... I have no way of knowing. They could also get tired of waiting and terminate me before I am able to return. Regardless, if they fire me I will receive unemployment benefits (at least temporarily); however, I would be uninsured and because I have received my settlement, I will not qualify for Medicaid. Should that happen, I will have to pay for insurance out of pocket, because I cannot be without insurance.
I could qualify for Medicaid if I were declared disabled by my doctor, but my Orthopaedic Surgeon is completely unwilling to entertain this idea at the moment; he feels it is much to early in my healing process to deem me permanently anything and what's more, he seems inappropriately optimistic. He seems rather convinced that within a year's time, I'll be power walking around with no cane and be able to do most things any normal person would do; I think he is an arse and expects too much from a leg that damn near didn't make it. He will not even issue me a permanent handicap tag (I do have temp tags). This makes me very angry, because I very much meet the requirements- one must not be able to walk 500 feet without needing assistance, and since he deemed the ankle brace necessary for my safety, technically that is walking with a device assisting me, regardless of whether or not I ever lose the cane for good. Regarding disability, I am of the impression that I can be declared disabled, work a certain amount of hours a month, receive Medicaid, and later be declared no longer disabled if that happens to become the case... in short, my doctor is looking at it backwards. I am going to see my Primary Care Physician to see if she would consider writing the papers; if not, I will look to another Orthopaedist for a second opinion.
You may be asking yourself why I am worried about all this... well, because I won't be able to return to work for a long time. My bone won't be healed for a long time. It won't be safe or comfortable for me to stand or walk for entire shifts at work for a long time. I still need at least one reconstructive surgery which will prolong my recovery. If I make any significant, substantial progress in therapy, it will be after months of it. I have to LIVE off of my settlement, with no income, until then.
The past eight months, I have received NO government assistance. I did not qualify for food stamps because I had $4K in a retirement fund that I couldn't touch. I didn't qualify for Medicaid because my employer was still paying my insurance. I didn't qualify for unemployment because my employer is 'holding a spot' for me; despite the fact that they hired two part-timers to replace me, and there is actually no spot for me to return to if I were to call up tomorrow and say, "Put me on the schedule!" Until now, I have lived entirely off of my mother, and all the donations I received.
Also, I recently found out that instead of absorbing the costs as I was led to believe they were by my manager, I actually owe my employer $1000 worth in premiums, and am lucky they did not spontaneously cancel my insurance. I was also told that it recently 'came to HR's attention' that I've been out of work, and since I was 1 1/2 months shy of being there a year, I don't qualify for the Family Medical Leave Act- thus, I have to file with my employer for a Leave of Absence, and it must be approved. I have to admit that this, and the insurance shenanigans make me nervous.
I'd like to take this moment to say that if, after reading my story, you do not believe that there is something wrong with our nation's current healthcare system, and believe that universal healthcare would be detrimental, you are out of your mind. I would not be quite so financially ruined right now, and I wouldn't have had to pull my family down with me, and not so worried about my future, if we had universal healthcare.

What happened to the guy?
He was charged with 'Failure to Yield'. It was thrown out in court, provided he pay for and take a driving class; Officer Rose said that the judge likely did that because the man had a previously clean driving record, and he felt sorry for him because he knew there was a personal injury suit pending. I don't agree with the charge, or the judge's decision, but it's not my place, and I don't need to stress about it. I feel like there was probably very little damage to his car, so a $75 Saturday class and $100 court fee for a dismissed charge doesn't satisfy me. I hope that his insurance carrier hiked up his premium, at least (I sure cost them a bunch).
I don't say this because I am all that angry; I'm not. I want him to remember. But I don't think there's a way he'll forget. I'm pretty sure he was standing there on the curb. I feel sure it was his voice I heard that was absolutely beside himself, asking Officer Rose if there was anything else he could do. But maybe I am wrong, maybe that was one of the two witnesses. All I know is that he has to live with what he did to me, and I'm glad. I hope he wakes up every day, and thinks about it. And I hope he learns from it. I hope he tells the people he knows not to do what he did, to pay attention when they are on the road. That's what I want from him.
I won't disclose the amount I ended up receiving, but I will say this- it was not enough. Part of that was by my choice- I settled with the maximum payout from the gentleman's insurance carrier, and chose not to go to court and sue him personally for additional damages (lost wages, diminished quality of life, permanent disability, emotional distress, etc). There were many reasons for this; I did not wish the stress of a court case upon myself or anyone else, there was the possibility of not being awarded enough to justify the effort/stress/money (or even worse, the judge maybe deciding that I didn't even need all of what the insurance company gave me), the court case would have taken a long time because I would have had to wait months and months and months and make extra doctor visits and paperwork to be able to prove things like permanent disability and emotional distress... but also, were I to sue the man and be awarded anything, I could end up garnishing paychecks or pension checks, and I decided that in this economy that was not something I was willing to do to somebody.

So, how are you? What have you taken away from all of this?
This has been a multifaceted experience. It's been harrowing, and enlightening. I have learned that my mother is the strongest person I know- the way she handled everything, taking care of my grandmother, going to work, and then going to the hospital and visiting me every night was astounding... and then all the care she gave me once I was home.
I have learned that things like this are hard on relationships, and I'm really proud to say that Lokky and I weathered this and came out stronger. I've learned who, out of all of my friends, was really and truly there for me when I needed them the most. I learned to bury the hatchet with my ex for good; we've been back to good friends for a while now.
I learned, too little too late, the true importance of wearing gear. ALL the time. Not just when it's convenient or comfortable.
I went through a unique kind of depression. I've been depressed before. This wasn't exactly like what I had previously experienced; not really worse, exactly, just different. Maybe because I didn't have the choice of getting up and doing something about it. I was stuck. What really brought me out of it was being able to be around Lokky again on a semi-regular basis; it wasn't just being around him, but his apartment. His apartment had become something close to home for me, and for six months I had been removed from it... it was comforting to be back somewhere that I felt was routine, safe, and normal.
But mostly, I learned how to lose. This whole ordeal has been about losing. I learned how to lose gracefully. When to give up; accept the loss and move forward. When not to give up, to fight for what you want. These are things I thought I knew; I learned them all over again, with a new kind of gravity. When you have something so significant taken from you without choice or warning, there's a new kind of light shed on the acceptance of loss. Different kinds of loss. And it's unexpected. And humbling. Very humbling.
I feel like I'm a more peaceful, more patient, more insightful person now. Like maybe I have a better view on life.

Whatcha gonna do now?
My first priorities are to secure an alternate mode of transportation, pay off ALL of my debts so that I can kind of have a financial reboot on life, do a few appliances and small projects to the house I am living in with my best friend, and invest a little money in myself (i.e., get new glasses, Invisalign braces, and laser hair removal since it is dangerous for me to shave or wax my left leg, with all the skin grafts). Other than that, I'm buying some fancy camping gear for rallies so that I can go camping gosh darn it, and trailer for towing the Stella.
I am looking into some contracted editing projects I can take on from home to pull in a teeny bit of money, and am going to research what I'd like to go to school and get a certification for.
I'm going to write my bucket list. Then I'm going to start looking at crossing some stuff off. Smile
I am considering writing about my experiences in a more in-depth manner; I am interested in finding a way to express my experience to the public. There are other people out there who are going through similar things that need to know they are not alone. But first and foremost, I'd like my tragedy to become a learning experience for the world; I believe strongly that education and awareness would honestly, on a widespread scale and over time, help the roads become safer. If I can use my experience for public outreach and safety and awareness education, then something truly good will have come from it.

And just for shits and giggles, I'm going to buy a lotto ticket. Cool


Last edited by LunaP on Fri Sep 28, 2012 8:55 am; edited 1 time in total
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Mutt the Hoople
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 21, 2012 2:19 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thank you so much for taking the time to write your experience down and to share it with us. It is probably a really healthy thing to do; to put it in order, as clearly as possible, and to understand what happened.

All I can say is that you are incredibly brave and strong... And compassionate, regarding the driver who hit you. I'm not sure I could be as kind as you have been to someone who so drastically changed my life.

I rely hope that your doctor's optimism is correct and that you will indeed. E power walking in the near future. I had a friend that was in a horrific accident a few years ago. It looked insurvivable but he really pulled through and has very little residual effect from it. I hope you are at least as lucky as he was.

Thanks again for sharing that. It had me in tears but at the same time your will power is amazing.

Good luck with the lottery ticket... Keeping my fingers crossed for you.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 21, 2012 3:17 am    Post subject: Re: A Long-Awaited Anouncement, A Story, And A Thank You To Reply with quote

Thanks for sharing all this.

About the orthopedic surgeon who doesn't want to declare you permanently disabled... maybe you should give him a break about that. Granted, I've run into surgeons who were overly confident about their healing powers there are a lot of them, including the guy who fixed-but-not-entirely my spine last year but "permanently disabled" tends to be a self-fulfilling prophesy.

I have two friends who've been classified as "disabled". One is textbook disabled: he wasn't supposed to survive infancy, has never been able to walk, and just had his 51st surgery (in fewer years). But he's spent his whole life trying to prove that he's not disabled, and aside from that whole not-walking business, he's a very able person. The other was born physically able, but has developed problems that he's pretty much decided that he's never going to overcome, so he doesn't put a sincere effort into trying. I'm not saying that's what you're doing... just holding him up as a cautionary example, the down-side of "acceptance".
Quote:
But mostly, I learned how to lose. .... I feel like I'm a more peaceful, more patient, more insightful person now. Like maybe I have a better view on life.
Life-changing loss happens to most of us, eventually. It certainly has to me (but a different kind than you've been facing). Sounds like you're dealing with it better than I have. :/
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 21, 2012 3:39 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Good luck n all!!! If that woulda happened to me, I wouldn"t know what to do! Since my whole life revolves around playing drums and percussion I'd be F*&^ed. Then I'd have to do something crazy like become an accountant. Or worse: Wear a tie....(no offence to all the accountants on this site).
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 21, 2012 4:35 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Mutt the Hoople wrote:
Thanks again for sharing that. It had me in tears but at the same time your will power is amazing.

Good luck with the lottery ticket... Keeping my fingers crossed for you.


Thanks Smile I want to share, in the hopes of inspiring, comforting, or cautioning others.

If by some stupid chance I happen to land the winning numbers, you'll know... MB will have a rally in Vegas! Cool

TVB wrote:

I have two friends who've been classified as "disabled". One is textbook disabled: he wasn't supposed to survive infancy, has never been able to walk, and just had his 51st surgery (in fewer years). But he's spent his whole life trying to prove that he's not disabled, and aside from that whole not-walking business, he's a very able person. The other was born physically able, but has developed problems that he's pretty much decided that he's never going to overcome, so he doesn't put a sincere effort into trying. I'm not saying that's what you're doing... just holding him up as a cautionary example, the down-side of "acceptance".


I understand. I don't feel that I am setting myself up for failure; more that I am trying to be realistic, whereas my surgeon is actually setting me up to believe in things that are likely not possible. Isn't giving false hope to patients one of the last thing doctors are supposed to do? I would be overjoyed to regain function and sensation, proper use and range of motion back. Seriously. There are days where I honestly wish that they had gone ahead and amputated anyway, because then I wouldn't have to deal with the pain and frustration. I don't feel that my surgeon is being realistic, practical, or acting in my best interest by refusing to consider me for the paperwork (as I said, it is my understanding that I can go on disability, and be removed from it later). I believe that I could recover a bit... but not to the extent he thinks I will. I also find it peculiar, because for months he was very negative about my prognosis, until I started inquiring about things like disability, and then suddenly he was very positive. It aggravated me a lot. It smelled of fish.

Drum Pro wrote:
Then I'd have to do something crazy like become an accountant. Or worse: Wear a tie....


Now, now, I've never met a guy that didn't look good in a tie! Wink
But I know what you mean... if for some reason things go south with my current employer, I'm going to end up with some gawd-awful entry level phone job. Shoot me. I hate phones.
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stevenopoly
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 21, 2012 10:21 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

i am a guy, but god damnit......I was tearing up reading this.
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 21, 2012 12:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I am astounded by the strength you've shown in writing this and posting it for the world. And in simply surviving the accident and...everything.

I'm going to side with your Ortho, and as one of those flaky newagey spiritual peeps I'm going to say Ortho's outlook changed suddenly and dramatically to encourage the patient's mind-body relationship to remain positive. Or at least neutral. I agree completely with TVB about avoiding a self-fulfilling prophecy.

That said, I do know of someone who was on disability and was subsequently able to go off disability. I would suggest a lot of research on the subject, including any consequences of disability status.


EDIT: Inspirational. Sincerely. And some much needed perspective.

And I hope some day to buy you a beer. Or a hard cider or a cosmo or something. Because I hate beer.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 21, 2012 1:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

yay!

I was hoping we'd hear a summary of everything eventually. Your accident happened not long after I joined, and was the 2nd time I had donated to an injured scooterist (in a very short time, I got kinda scared!).

Glad you came through, and keep on recovering!

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 21, 2012 3:35 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

positive energy in your direction !!
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 21, 2012 4:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Shocked at your ordeal, but amazed by your recovery. You are one strong person. Never give up, and believe me, I'm sending positive energy your way...
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 21, 2012 7:11 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Simply amazing that you have so far come through this horrible and life-altering ordeal with such a good attitude. Despite your wonderfully written description, I can't even imagine what it's been like for you since the accident. (Except maybe the wound-vac...I had one of those at one point...ouch) You're an inspiration and I can't wait to read that book you're about to write!

Healing thoughts and prayers that you continue to improve and that your life gets a little better every day.

Brenda

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 21, 2012 8:26 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Very nice write up, thank you for sharing. And thank you Lokky and all your family for being by your side during the whole ordeal. It sounds very painful, and wishing you a continued recovery.
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 22, 2012 1:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

God bless you and yours LunaP!
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 22, 2012 7:11 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

ravenlore wrote:
And I hope some day to buy you a beer. Or a hard cider or a cosmo or something. Because I hate beer.


I'd love you to! I don't like beer either, actually... Lokky and I usually drink cider, and it just so happens that there's allegedly a cider brewery (cidery?) that has opened and will sell their first stuff next spring, right behind Scoot Richmond... we're excited Razz

skully93 wrote:
yay!

I was hoping we'd hear a summary of everything eventually. Your accident happened not long after I joined, and was the 2nd time I had donated to an injured scooterist (in a very short time, I got kinda scared!).

Glad you came through, and keep on recovering!


Thank you... I will. Hopefully I'll be riding around on the back of the Stella before too long.
I had hoped to pay it forward and donate a few hundred to others through Scooter Relief .Org, but whoever runs that site seems to have let everything lapse and is not updating or adding new cases. All the donation events have ended. Confused

scubadoobie wrote:
Simply amazing that you have so far come through this horrible and life-altering ordeal with such a good attitude. Despite your wonderfully written description, I can't even imagine what it's been like for you since the accident. (Except maybe the wound-vac...I had one of those at one point...ouch) You're an inspiration and I can't wait to read that book you're about to write!

Healing thoughts and prayers that you continue to improve and that your life gets a little better every day.

Brenda


I'm sorry you've ever had the misfortune of becoming acquainted with a wound vac, Brenda!

Thank you everybody, I really do sincerely appreciate all of you.

I am sort of thinking about a book. Or something.
In the meantime, I'm happy to say that my experience will be making a debut on a scooter-related blog in the next couple weeks- details to come! Smile
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 22, 2012 12:06 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

LunaP wrote:
Lokky and I usually drink cider, and it just so happens that there's allegedly a cider brewery (cidery?)

The traditional term is "cider mill" (but "brewery" is fine too).

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PostPosted: Sat Sep 22, 2012 5:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Luna,

I wasnt able to read the whole thread so forgive me if this has already been mentioned.I was under the impression that one can apply for temporary disability,you know in cases just like yours where you are disabled for now. I believe the temporary disabled people have the red handicap signs in their cars while permanent disabled people have the blue signs.Anyone here know about this? Just an FYI.I could be off my rocker.

Hey no matter Thanks for taking the time to post and I will be thinking of you often.Get well!

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PostPosted: Sat Sep 22, 2012 6:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

BuddyLicious wrote:
I was under the impression that one can apply for temporary disability,you know in cases just like yours where you are disabled for now. I believe the temporary disabled people have the red handicap signs in their cars while permanent disabled people have the blue signs.Anyone here know about this?

Handicapped parking permits are issued by states, and each state's rules are a bit different. In Oregon, there are both permanent and temporary permits. If your doctor will endorse the application for temporarty disability, you can get a temporary permit for a defined period - based on an injury, surgery, whatever. Temporary permits are renewable.
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 22, 2012 10:25 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Luna, you are an inspiration to "enjoy the journey" or at least as in your case, "make the most positive out of the journey". When you are ready or only if you want to, please tell us what you would do differently if you had it to do over again. I know it is "Monday morning quarterbacking" but it may teach the rest of us how to avoid a similar situation. You are the most qualified on this subject. More qualified than ANY MSF instructor.

You keep on livin' gal. Keep on being an inspiration. Heal as best you can and don't ever be a stranger.

Karl
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PostPosted: Sun Sep 23, 2012 12:16 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Definitely the most painful and affecting post ever on MB. They say there are no second acts in American life, but I feel completely certain there is going to be an worthy and inspiring second act to this story. I look forward to reading it! Smile
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 24, 2012 3:43 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Wow, your amazing to come through this with such a strong spirit, may you your recovery continue every day. Smile
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 24, 2012 5:34 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Luna are you crazy or something i can't read ALL that!! i'm gonna have to Kindle this bad boy hit computer

Razz Razz

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 24, 2012 9:38 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

wow, luna, you have done just blowed my mind.
thank you for posting that. I am so happy for your progress, and really just, wow.

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 24, 2012 2:00 pm    Post subject: Lonh awaited announcement Reply with quote

Luna- let me join the others in thanking you for this post and know that I am praying for your full recovery. There were many times when I wondered how you were doing and I am glad you got the settlement worked out so you can keep us up to date now. I know you still have a long ways to go but you have the strength and the will to get yourself there. You have a big cheering section here on MB! You have excellent writing skills so a blog or a book or any type of writing career would be something to consider for your future. Postive vibes and good wishes are being sent out your way!
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 25, 2012 1:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Luna,

Your post was beautifully written and riveting in every detail. I'm so sorry this happened to you. If you aren't a professional writer you should be, please continue writing, you have a very great gift.

I wish you peace and improvement in every facet of your life.

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 26, 2012 10:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

BuddyLicious wrote:
Luna,

I wasnt able to read the whole thread so forgive me if this has already been mentioned.I was under the impression that one can apply for temporary disability,you know in cases just like yours where you are disabled for now. I believe the temporary disabled people have the red handicap signs in their cars while permanent disabled people have the blue signs.Anyone here know about this? Just an FYI.I could be off my rocker.

Hey no matter Thanks for taking the time to post and I will be thinking of you often.Get well!


Thank you! I am trying. You aren't off your rocker! I do have a temporary handicap parking tag... but the handicap tags aren't related to being on disability. Apparently, at least in my state, disability isn't really meant for 'short-term' situations like mine... so even though I can leave the disability program in the event that my situation changes and I no longer need it, doctors are very reluctant to write or recommend disability status for anyone not seriously and obviously disabled permanently. This is the basic disagreement that my Ortho and I are having, when you boil it down; he is convinced I will basically be fine in a year or so, and I know I will not be. He sees me as as short term case, and I am not. I could be out of work for a total of 1.5-3 years; and my settlement is not large enough that it will support me for that long, and the economy is not so healthy that I can easily find a job that suits my needs and pays properly. Rock and a hard place, I'm afraid.

theflash784 wrote:
Luna- let me join the others in thanking you for this post and know that I am praying for your full recovery. There were many times when I wondered how you were doing and I am glad you got the settlement worked out so you can keep us up to date now. I know you still have a long ways to go but you have the strength and the will to get yourself there. You have a big cheering section here on MB! You have excellent writing skills so a blog or a book or any type of writing career would be something to consider for your future. Postive vibes and good wishes are being sent out your way!


I am also very glad that I can talk about it now. I feel... free, I guess.
And I'm sorry it's so long! Embarassed There was just so much to tell, that had built up over the last several months. I tried to section it and make it easier on the eyes...

BuddyBliss wrote:
Luna,

Your post was beautifully written and riveting in every detail. I'm so sorry this happened to you. If you aren't a professional writer you should be, please continue writing, you have a very great gift.

I wish you peace and improvement in every facet of your life.


Thank you, very much. Writing is something I have thought about doing since high school... but back then, I was silly and wanted to write fantasy novels. I actually didn't try to make this an especially pretty piece of prose, in the interest of 'trimming the fat' and being a little more to the point, since I knew it would be stupidly long already Shocked

I do really and truly want to reach the public and tell my story, and I have a feeling that writing about it will be the stepping stone that bridges the gap.

CROSSBOLT wrote:
Luna, you are an inspiration to "enjoy the journey" or at least as in your case, "make the most positive out of the journey". When you are ready or only if you want to, please tell us what you would do differently if you had it to do over again. I know it is "Monday morning quarterbacking" but it may teach the rest of us how to avoid a similar situation. You are the most qualified on this subject. More qualified than ANY MSF instructor.

You keep on livin' gal. Keep on being an inspiration. Heal as best you can and don't ever be a stranger.

Karl


Thank you, Karl. This is a fantastic thing to ask.

However, this situation could not have been avoided by me. I spent many hours in the hospital wondering, "How could I have gotten myself into this mess?" The answer is that I didn't.

We all say that we drive safely on the road. That we are on our best behavior on the road, everyday. Sometimes our 'best' really isn't our best, and regardless of who we tell that, we know it in the back of our heads when we say it. But then, there are other times where we honestly did do our best. And it still didn't matter. This was one of those times.

It was in the middle of the day. On a sunny day. The road surface was not dangerous. I was not speeding. I had no alternate exit from the situation. If I had jammed the brakes, I would have just high-sided into the car, or maybe low-sided and skidded (possibly under the car), and that could have been just as bad, or worse.

I could have worn lighter or brighter colored jacket and helmet (both were black). I could have worn boots and armored pants or shinguards. But even if I had, that crash would have still happened. This man either did not look, or looked right at me and did not see me. If I had been wearing armored pants, I may have saved myself some of the terrible tissue damage and muscle loss; but I would still have sustained every broken bone that I did, still separated my shoulder, still been in the hospital, still been out of work, still had a destroyed scooter and property.

This is because that day, the other driver was 'doing his best'. And it was all fine that it wasn't really honestly his best. Until he nearly killed me. This driver was not a teenager. He wasn't even my age. This driver was maybe about 50 years old. His driving record was good, if we can believe what I heard after traffic court. He didn't hit me because he is a habitually reckless or purposefully careless driver.

He hit me because when he gets on the road, the only thing he thinks about is other cars, stoplights, and maybe police cruisers. Americans are not taught to truly consider things other than cars on the road. It is taught and enforced briefly during driver education programs when we are what, 15? Then nobody says anything ever again after that. And two-wheeled vehicles, especially small, everyday commuters such as the scooterfolk of America, are not frequent enough on the road to give these masses of unlearned people a constant reminder that we exist, and we belong on the road with them.

Something needs to change that. A media campaign needs to happen. Driver's education courses need to point more attention to it. Scooters and motorcycles must become more prevalent. When the general public wakes up, gets in the car, and pulls out of the driveway thinking "Is there are car or motorcycle coming?" THEN I might be able to say that America is ready for us. Until then, when we get on two wheels, we are in fact assuming extra risks that we shouldn't have to. Because of an ignorant public.

That is what I took away from this. This realization, and the motivation to do something to change it. However, I somewhat lack the resources to do anything other than preach online and to friends.
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PostPosted: Thu Sep 27, 2012 1:29 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

We need more of this:

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 27, 2012 6:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Luna,

I was not able to donate anything to you but have been praying for your recovery. After reading, I am amazed that you are still here. I will continue to pray for the coming days and the challenges you will face.

Roxanne
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PostPosted: Thu Sep 27, 2012 7:06 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

i'm brushing away tears as well . . . you are one of the strongest people i have never met Smile if i ever do meet you, there WILL be ciders! i love cider. what are you guys' favorite brands?

look at it this way - if things go south with your job, you can become a cider-drinking, kick-ass fantasy author!!!!
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PostPosted: Thu Sep 27, 2012 7:17 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Wow. Thanks for the information, very enlightening to see what can happen sometimes, whether you are careful or not and how wholly that can affect your life.

I sent a little something in when the donation thing got going. It wasn't a lot, but I want to publicly object here to your feeling like you have to pay it back. Maybe I'm speaking for myself, but I didn't offer it as a loan, it was a donation. I would be bummed to have you struggle even a tiny bit to come up with that money on top of everything else that has happened. It's not as if you have 'lucked out' with what people have given, and I think we all gave it knowing it could be any one of us.

Just concentrate on getting well!

Do you think you'll ride again? I found myself wondering if I would while I was reading about everything that happened to you.. I really don't know if I could.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 12:47 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm glad to have an update. Have been watching and hoping for the best. This sort of ordeal could happen to all of us at any time. And i am glad you are such a fighter. Best wishes and hope you see progress everyday. This will be behind you before you know it. Smile
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 9:24 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I put this at the top of the thread as well, but here's a link to my Flickr if anybody is interested in photos of my leg (healed up, not graphic) and xrays. I'm going to add photos of the Buddy once I get my hands on them.

TVB wrote:
We need more of this:


YES! I agree wholeheartedly! Very Happy

Roxanne and Bigbro, thank you... I have my up days and down days, and I suspect it will be that way for a looong time. The ups can trick me really well, too. It's really disappointing sometimes. It's really awesome to have so many people being so supportive.

black sunshine wrote:
i'm brushing away tears as well . . . you are one of the strongest people i have never met Smile if i ever do meet you, there WILL be ciders! i love cider. what are you guys' favorite brands?

look at it this way - if things go south with your job, you can become a cider-drinking, kick-ass fantasy author!!!!


Haha, thank you. My sisters and I are actually thinking about trucking down to Hotlanta to have a booth at MoMoCon next March (an anime convention, my little sister is a budding artist). If that happens, I'll take you up on the cider! Wink

We really enjoy Ace's and Angry Orchard. Lokky also loves Sir Perry, I've never had a chance to try it.

Tom wrote:
I sent a little something in when the donation thing got going. It wasn't a lot, but I want to publicly object here to your feeling like you have to pay it back. Maybe I'm speaking for myself, but I didn't offer it as a loan, it was a donation. I would be bummed to have you struggle even a tiny bit to come up with that money on top of everything else that has happened. It's not as if you have 'lucked out' with what people have given, and I think we all gave it knowing it could be any one of us.

Just concentrate on getting well!

Do you think you'll ride again? I found myself wondering if I would while I was reading about everything that happened to you.. I really don't know if I could.


I anticipated some of you really super nice people not wanting me to return the money Smile However, I'm SUPER stubborn, and truly believe I should pay it forward; I'd already decided that the portions whose contributors did not want it returned would instead be donated to others on scooterrelief.org; but I'm Confused to find, upon looking at the site, that whoever runs that site has let all of the events lapse out of date and there are no new causes to donate to; this is sad to me. I will instead perhaps donate to the low cost animal clinic downtown?? Not sure.

As for riding again... I will certainly try. Once my bone is healed and I can stand the vibrations, you can be sure to find me on the back of Lokky's Stella at least occasionally. I'm entertaining the idea of keeping an eye out on CL to see if the perfect, cheap Buddy 50 or Honda Met pops up in the right color, just to have around for, say, camping rallies and such. But all in good time.
I can say that it isn't in my nature to quit riding because I got thrown off the horse, so to speak. However, I don't actually know what kind of feelings I will have when I get back on the road and begin driving... I'll probably have to be slow about it for a bit. It's easy to startle me now, especially in the car... if another car merges suddenly, or cuts us off, or if mum has to slam on the brakes, it scares me half to death. Like, it can scare me bad enough that I'm queasy. It'll be interesting, for sure... but I don't think it's anything I can't get past Wink
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 9:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Holy shattered bones Luna, just saw the pics and I am still cringing. The grafting looks like skin colored carbon fiber. Ouch,ouch,ouch.

Not that its worth anything, here's some fatherly advice "Don't ever give up".

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 9:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

agrogod wrote:
Holy shattered bones Luna, just saw the pics and I am still cringing. The grafting looks like skin colored carbon fiber. Ouch,ouch,ouch.

Not that its worth anything, here's some fatherly advice "Don't ever give up".



Haha sorry... I kinda have nerves of steel when I comes to looking at stuff like that. I love medical-y stuff. Unless, y'know, it involves PAIN. Not a fan. I've never thought about it before, but you're right about the grafts!! I hated them for the longest time, because I likened them to chicken skin. Embarassed

My best friend and I are thinking about getting negative lightning resistance tattoos, because we both have metal in our legs (he's got screws in his ankle). Laughing
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 9:37 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

ouch those photos hurt a little. great because it looks as if you healed very well, but it sucks because it happened at all

hope all is on the way up, now. for good Smile

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ravenlore
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 1:28 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

LunaP wrote:


Tom wrote:
I sent a little something in when the donation thing got going. It wasn't a lot, but I want to publicly object here to your feeling like you have to pay it back. Maybe I'm speaking for myself, but I didn't offer it as a loan, it was a donation. I would be bummed to have you struggle even a tiny bit to come up with that money on top of everything else that has happened. It's not as if you have 'lucked out' with what people have given, and I think we all gave it knowing it could be any one of us.

Just concentrate on getting well!

Do you think you'll ride again? I found myself wondering if I would while I was reading about everything that happened to you.. I really don't know if I could.


I anticipated some of you really super nice people not wanting me to return the money Smile However, I'm SUPER stubborn, and truly believe I should pay it forward; I'd already decided that the portions whose contributors did not want it returned would instead be donated to others on scooterrelief.org; but I'm Confused to find, upon looking at the site, that whoever runs that site has let all of the events lapse out of date and there are no new causes to donate to; this is sad to me. I will instead perhaps donate to the low cost animal clinic downtown?? Not sure.



I too, very respectfuly decline to be paid back. I donated because I know I am fortunate to be in a position to do so, even if only modestly. And because I know that any given day, it could be me. Or my sister. If you wish to pay it forward and are unable to find a scooter community donation group, allow me to suggest the National Association of Free and Charitable Clinics. http://www.nafcclinics.org/ might be worth of consideration?

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DCUNITED4LIFE
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 2:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

You know Seven Hills loves you grrrl! We always here in RVA for ya!
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theflash784
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 2:34 pm    Post subject: Announcement Reply with quote

Luna- Please don't worry about paying me back either. I am probably better off than most here with a steady pension and good medical bennies. You may need that little bit down the road until you can get back to some kind of work. If you get secure money wise, you can make a donation to an animal shelter or homeless shelter or help out someone else in need. I've had friends help me out when I needed it and I am glad to help out in return.
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black sunshine
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 3:57 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

LunaP wrote:
Haha, thank you. My sisters and I are actually thinking about trucking down to Hotlanta to have a booth at MoMoCon next March (an anime convention, my little sister is a budding artist). If that happens, I'll take you up on the cider! Wink

We really enjoy Ace's and Angry Orchard. Lokky also loves Sir Perry, I've never had a chance to try it.


definitely let me know if you make it down to MoMoCon! i haven't been to it in a few years but it's usually pretty fun. there's also Anime Weekend Atlanta (which is THIS weekend), Anime Day Atlanta in November, and a couple of other cons (including of course Dragon*Con) . . . does your sister have a Deviantart page or anything?

Ace's is ace, have you tried their pumpkin cider (i have not)? Angry Orchard is new to us down here and i love it! Sir Perry is ok, a little bit mediciney to me. other faves: Hornsby's, Crispin (so many varieties!), and i just tried Thistly Cross recently and liked that as well!
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LunaP
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 5:09 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

ravenlore wrote:
I too, very respectfuly decline to be paid back. I donated because I know I am fortunate to be in a position to do so, even if only modestly. And because I know that any given day, it could be me. Or my sister. If you wish to pay it forward and are unable to find a scooter community donation group, allow me to suggest the National Association of Free and Charitable Clinics. http://www.nafcclinics.org/ might be worth of consideration?


This is a also a good idea, thank you! Previously, my two ideas were the animal clinic, and the volunteer rescue squad near my house; both are places that rely heavily on community donations, have helped me in the past, and need renovations to the facility and new equipment and are trying to raise money for it.

black sunshine wrote:
LunaP wrote:
Haha, thank you. My sisters and I are actually thinking about trucking down to Hotlanta to have a booth at MoMoCon next March (an anime convention, my little sister is a budding artist). If that happens, I'll take you up on the cider! Wink

We really enjoy Ace's and Angry Orchard. Lokky also loves Sir Perry, I've never had a chance to try it.


definitely let me know if you make it down to MoMoCon! i haven't been to it in a few years but it's usually pretty fun. there's also Anime Weekend Atlanta (which is THIS weekend), Anime Day Atlanta in November, and a couple of other cons (including of course Dragon*Con) . . . does your sister have a Deviantart page or anything?

Ace's is ace, have you tried their pumpkin cider (i have not)? Angry Orchard is new to us down here and i love it! Sir Perry is ok, a little bit mediciney to me. other faves: Hornsby's, Crispin (so many varieties!), and i just tried Thistly Cross recently and liked that as well!


YAY a fellow otaku! Nerd I haven't heard of Thistly Cross... I am okay with Crispin and Hornsby's. I didn't know Ace's had a pumpkin cider, I'll have to try it!! A few of the Krogers around here carry Ace's, but I think I'll have to go to the specialty store to get it. I prefer the Trader Joe's brand (I think it's called Newton's Folley?) over Hornsby's, tbh.

My sister's devianart username is moujin, and we have a website... Blind Alley Studios. We've been to our local con 2 years now. I think she's a wonderful artist, but she's modest to a fault, and uber critical of her own stuff... I have trouble convincing her to post things online, or sell prints online. She does comissions, though! She's wonderful at chibis, and pretty men. And fantastic at making super tiny character art for our buttons.
I'd love to go to Dragon Con someday, but it's not in the cards now. Otakon is big enough for me. I went to Anime Expo in LA once, and that was almost so big I couldn't enjoy it Shocked I'd be scared Dragon con would be like that.
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black sunshine
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PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 6:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

LunaP wrote:
YAY a fellow otaku! Nerd I haven't heard of Thistly Cross... I am okay with Crispin and Hornsby's. I didn't know Ace's had a pumpkin cider, I'll have to try it!! A few of the Krogers around here carry Ace's, but I think I'll have to go to the specialty store to get it. I prefer the Trader Joe's brand (I think it's called Newton's Folley?) over Hornsby's, tbh.


i like the Newton's Folly too, from what i remember. there's a Jack's Cider that's been coming into stores lately. oh yeah, and also a brand called Kopparberg that's been making the rounds - i've had the pear and they have a kiwi strawberry flavor o_O

Quote:
My sister's devianart username is moujin, and we have a website... Blind Alley Studios. We've been to our local con 2 years now. I think she's a wonderful artist, but she's modest to a fault, and uber critical of her own stuff... I have trouble convincing her to post things online, or sell prints online. She does comissions, though! She's wonderful at chibis, and pretty men. And fantastic at making super tiny character art for our buttons.
I'd love to go to Dragon Con someday, but it's not in the cards now. Otakon is big enough for me. I went to Anime Expo in LA once, and that was almost so big I couldn't enjoy it Shocked I'd be scared Dragon con would be like that.


sweet! i like the chibi!!! and yeah . . . Dragon*Con is kind of like that. see:



uggggh i can't wait for next year!!!
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scubadoobie
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Seafoam Buddy 125 "iScoot"

PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 6:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Luna, add me to the list of donors who do not wish to be repaid. I was paying a little bit forward. If you feel like you need to pay it back, pay my portion forward instead to whomever you feel needs it most.

Prayers for healing continue...
Brenda

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 28, 2012 9:38 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm glad to hear that you're healing up and that the legality part is behind you. That had to be a traumatic experience and the fact that you're able to look back at it so calmly is impressive.
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BoneGirl
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 29, 2012 12:09 am    Post subject: No words... Reply with quote

Dear Luna,

I don't even know where to begin. Lagerhead told me about the thread today and I just finished reading your comments and those of other MB members.

As a medical professional for ages and an x-ray tech for the last 25+ years, I have seen what you have gone through many, many times. It always breaks my heart and always makes me ponder how I would deal with the same circumstance. I honestly don't know the answer to that.

But I do know that you have been fighting a huge uphill battle and I can't tell you how proud and how pleased I am with your courage and determination to end the battle and start rebuilding the battlefield for yourself and those around you.

My ex-supervisor hit and killed a motorcyclist and she, herself, is a motorcyclist. The man was drunk, it was dark, he crossed the center line on a curve and she came around the corner in her SUV and hit him. She was in no way at fault but no one will ever know the mental pain she endures for taking a human life. As far as the man who caused the injuries, yes, he will live with this forever. In your case, the man WAS at fault and he knows it. He must be aware of the tragedy he has caused in your life due to his negligence. If so, he lives with the fact he has altered another person's life. I hope at some point you forgive him and he forgives himself; neither is easy.

There is a lawyer in the Cincinnati area who is also a motorcyclist. I have read so many of his articles in local riding magazines and he tries motorcycle cases. He says year after year the story is the same time after time. The person who struck and injured/killed the motorcyclist "Didn't see them". His viewpoint is people in vehicles are so busy looking for other vehicles, box-like structures, that can harm them, they really don't see the 2-wheeler. We are a bug on their windshield. They are looking at the cars, trucks, buses around us and they seem to look past us. In comparison to those vehicles, we are quite small. He says loud pipes don't save anyone's life because you're still the bug on the windshield.

I am sure this is why we are taught in the MSF course to keep one thing in mind at all times: YOU ARE INVISIBLE! They couldn't stress that enough. All the hi-vis gear, bright bike paint, etc, just makes you a a prettier bug but not necessarily any kind of a threat as they search the traffic around you. That tiny SMART car will still do more harm to them than your motorcycle or scooter. It's a shame but it seems to be the factual truth after hearing so many injury stories.

Continue to move forward. Continue to proactively find ways to make your future better and brighter. A second opinion from another orthopedist is a good idea. Know that the donations made to you were all done with a happy heart and don't spend the effort returning the money. From what I've read, they don't want it back. If there is a way to pay it forward to someone else in need, and it's not going to be a burden on you, do it. If it creates any tension for you whatsoever, put it away for a rainy day or save it until you find the right cause to donate it to.

Thank you for sharing the details of what you have been through. I admit it made me have second thoughts of getting on my scooter tonight. I was hit by a car riding my bicycle a couple years before I owned a scooter. Getting "back on the horse" is much easier said than done. When I bought my first Buddy, I had memories of that bicycle accident and it was one more reinforcement of why I never owned a motorized vehicle before that purchase. But I rode a bicycle and rode a scooter afterwards and have never regretted it. But you better believe I am never on "auto pilot" when I ride either.

I do my best to speak to motorcyclists and vehicle drivers at every opportunity about sharing the road safely. I will continue to do this as a token of appreciation for what you have struggled with. If there is anything else we can do to support you, please do not hesitate to ask. You have a community of people on MB who are more than willing to fight the good fight beside you.
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persephonelily
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 29, 2012 2:44 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I just emailed for an application at scooterelief.org for my husband. Thanks for the idea; although I see that you are correct about the lack of recent events.

I looked at your pictures and all I can say is...well, nothing. I rarely have a physical reaction to injuries, but yours hit me right in the chest. I can only hope to have the kind of strength (both of body and character) that you have shown in this situation if ever I am faced with such a thing. What do you need now? You seem to have the financial figured out for the time being; what can I do? Do you need care packages? Cookies? Warm mittens? I can do these things. Please give me something that I can do for you.
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none yet - Got a motorcycle. Does that count?

PostPosted: Sun Sep 30, 2012 12:48 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Wheeewwwww!! Oh, you poor girl!

I am so sorry that you went through all of that. And I hope that now the worst is behind you.

I don't know what all you are considering job-wise but I have a niece who is taking online courses to become a medical transcriptionist. I'm told that usually these people can mostly work from home and in the case of our local hospital, they usually only come into the office for one day a week. I'm also told it makes pretty good money and that there's a lot of demand for them. Might not be anywhere near what you are wanting to do but who knows?
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PostPosted: Sun Sep 30, 2012 7:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Luna, I hadn't joined MB before chipping in to the collection for you. Please do not refund me, either; use it however you deem appropriate.

Thank you for sharing the story of your accident and road to recovery. I hope you experience the most positive outcomes in the healing your body; it seems that your mind has already found the way there. Very Happy

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 01, 2012 7:08 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

finally read it. whew!

good stuff, Luna Smile

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LunaP
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PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2012 6:10 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

persephonelily wrote:
I just emailed for an application at scooterelief.org for my husband. Thanks for the idea; although I see that you are correct about the lack of recent events.

I looked at your pictures and all I can say is...well, nothing. I rarely have a physical reaction to injuries, but yours hit me right in the chest. I can only hope to have the kind of strength (both of body and character) that you have shown in this situation if ever I am faced with such a thing. What do you need now? You seem to have the financial figured out for the time being; what can I do? Do you need care packages? Cookies? Warm mittens? I can do these things. Please give me something that I can do for you.


Thank you, you're very sweet, but maybe I should be asking these things of you? Is your hubs okay??
It has previously been my policy to never turn down cookies, but I sure won't ask anybody to ship me them... I don't really need any help gaining weight Laughing Let's see... you can... hmm... keep an eye out on your CL for a good deal on a pink or St Tropez Buddy Cool

Southerner wrote:
I don't know what all you are considering job-wise but I have a niece who is taking online courses to become a medical transcriptionist. I'm told that usually these people can mostly work from home and in the case of our local hospital, they usually only come into the office for one day a week. I'm also told it makes pretty good money and that there's a lot of demand for them. Might not be anywhere near what you are wanting to do but who knows?


Actually, you're the third person I've had tell me exactly this; one of the others is my therapist. She says exactly the same thing, that she has a good friend who works from home transcribing for a living and makes a decent yearly doing so. I won't lie, the concept of working from home sounds very inviting... but I can see myself having some issues with distraction, haha. I have an above-average wpm (considering I still hunt and peck) and already have some knowledge of medical terminology. I don't see a reason not to look into it; I'll have to look and see if my local community college has classes for this.


In other news, I took home my new car last week (see separate post) and so far, I've been alright on the road- no terrible scares or anxiety attacks. I've been making sure I drive at least an hour or so every day. It's hurting my shoulder and wrist some, but at the moment it's very much worth it to be able to go out by myself, not depend on other people/their schedules, be able to make my own appointments... makes me feel a lot more normal.
And I get to start going to scooter club meetings again Very Happy
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Aguacate
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PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2012 10:37 am    Post subject: wow, just wow Reply with quote

Great write up (a little too great, I had to go lie down for a minute after I read about the accident scene). I am going to buy a knee hi pair of Doc Martens right this minute. I separated my shoulder and badly fractured my wrist in a bike accident and know just a fraction of the pain/reduced mobility you are going through. I couldn't bend my wrist AT ALL when I came out of the cast. It took another two manipulations under anesthesia and almost a year to get my normal range of motion back. I can't imagine having to go through what you have gone through and coming out mentally OK like you have. Please stay positive. Setting goals really helped for me, some short term, some long term and some I thought were unattainable. I am so glad you have had supportive friends and family. thanks for sharing this story.
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persephonelily
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PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2012 10:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

[quote="LunaP"]
persephonelily wrote:


Thank you, you're very sweet, but maybe I should be asking these things of you? Is your hubs okay??
It has previously been my policy to never turn down cookies, but I sure won't ask anybody to ship me them... I don't really need any help gaining weight Laughing Let's see... you can... hmm... keep an eye out on your CL for a good deal on a pink or St Tropez Buddy Cool



He's getting there. Still hurts to move too much, and the pin is really bothering him, but he's improving. We may be broke and begging for pocket change, but I can still bake and knit! Is pink your color? I can work with pink!

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